


crumbling

by nonbinarywithaknife (littleboxes)



Series: just let them REST alex [9]
Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: Abrupt Ending, Claustrophobia, Emotional Hurt, Ficlet, Gen, Panic Attacks, Vague Spoilers for Episode 142
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-19
Updated: 2020-01-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:00:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22326748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleboxes/pseuds/nonbinarywithaknife
Summary: Hamid getting separated from her is one thing too many for Azu to handle.
Relationships: Hamid Saleh Haroun al-Tahan & Azu
Series: just let them REST alex [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1514891
Comments: 7
Kudos: 48





	crumbling

**Author's Note:**

> _please_ someone talk to azu about her feelings she is overdue for a good old fashioned cry and i am WORRIED

The grate slams shut and Azu doesn’t wince at the way the sound echoes louder, down here, because she’s already running and trying to lift it up. Zolf helps, but it’s clear pretty soon that it’s dead-bolted to the ground and no amount of strength save an industrial lever could lift it up. Hamid is smiling at them through the grate, and he’s trying _so hard_ to be positive about it, but his smile is so brittle they can all see through it. 

He tells them it will be okay, that he has Skraak and he’ll just follow the tunnel until he meets back up with them but Azu’s hands are shaking and she can’t make them stop shaking and she’s thinking about the sewer she had to squeeze through outside of Damascus and the way the ceilings here are low enough she’s had to duck slightly, and she’s thinking about the feeling of a small hand slipping from hers and Hamid’s smile is so, _so_ brittle, and she can’t lose him, she _can’t_ , he’s the only one she has _left_. 

Azu is on the floor. She doesn’t hear the clang of her armor hitting the ground or the worried exclamations of Cel and Zolf and Hamid, and it’s not until Cel puts a hand on her shoulder that she realizes she’s crying. 

“I can’t, I can’t, I can’t, it’s so small it’s so _tight_ , here, I can’t breathe just let me out just-,” Azu can’t stop whispering, and she tries to shove it all down, because they’re in the middle of a _mission_ , and she has to _protect her friends_ but the walls are closing in on her and her armor feels tight and she can’t _breathe_ and it feels like every second the not-presences of Sasha and Grizzop are pulling her down and Azu can’t-

-

One second, Zolf is telling Hamid that they’ll meet him at the next junction and very firmly _not_ thinking of the Paris catacombs and the next there’s a loud _clank!_ and Azu is on the ground. She’s curled up with her arms around her knees and as he rushes over praying that it’s not some poison they missed he hears her choked whispering and _does not think_ about the catacombs. 

It’s a panic attack definitely, but Zolf doesn’t know Azu and doesn’t want to make it worse by touching her and he can hear Hamid freaking out behind him, asking _what’s going on?_ in a frightened tone that’s a step closer to hysteria than Zolf can handle right now. 

Cel takes the decision out of his hands when they lay a gentle hand on Azu’s shoulder, “Hey buddy, it’s alright, just… just breathe, okay?”

Azu doesn’t seem to be hearing them, and Zolf is _not_ thinking about the catacombs and trying frantically to keep Hamid from dying of shock and trying to ward off shock of his own and the horrible, horrible awareness that his good leg was _gone_ and Cel looks just as out of their depth as he feels right now, and Hamid is still begging to know what’s going on and Zolf really, _really_ wishes the world hadn’t ended a few months ago. 


End file.
